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” I felt like I was not a wife, but a maid. My family did not support me or stand by me because they thought it was normal to be treated like this.
I felt alone in all my struggles.
Being able to tell my story on stage in the “Beit Beyout” production is what I appreciate the most about the Intisar Foundation drama therapy programme.
Standing on stage and telling parts of my story helped me in ways that I could not imagine.
I was heard and seen for the first time.
“
My name is Um Ameer. I’m a 28-year-old Syrian refugee living in Beirut. I’m a mother to one boy, and I currently do not work. I studied until the 6th grade.
My home life was extremely difficult, I lived through a war in Syria. I was married to a person who had some political connections, and when the war started, we realised that we could not live a safe life anymore. We had to flee to Lebanon in order to escape any potential danger that my husband could face.
In Syria, we had lived a fairly good life, but after coming to Lebanon we had to face many challenges, such as living in a house without electricity, not being able to work and live a decent life. Before long, I learned that my husband at the time was cheating on me with someone close to me. As if being a refugee woman was not bad enough, I was constantly disrespected in my own house. We eventually divorced, and I remarried and had my son.
My luck did not seem to change as even my new husband soon started cheating on me. I would spend hours alone at home with our new born child, wondering where he was, who he was with. I felt like I was not a wife, but a maid. My family did not support me or stand by me because they thought it was normal to be treated like this. I felt alone in all my struggles.
In 2019, my friend attended the Intisar Foundation drama therapy sessions which motivated me to apply in the hope that it would help me feel better. At that point in my life, I felt as if I was an empty shell, a person who had nothing to live for. If it was not for my son, I do not know what I would have done to myself. I felt insecure and had no inner strength to push me to do better.
” I will never forget the first time when I was able to tell my story during the Intisar Foundation drama therapy sessions and open up about my life and how may family had treated me badly for years. ”
I will never forget the first time when I was able to tell my story during the drama therapy sessions and open up about my life and how may family had treated me badly for years. I remember that I felt safe, when I asked the facilitator, “Can I talk?”, and she said yes, so I felt safe. She made me feel strong and supported, and I knew that, for once, I would be able to confide in people who cared about me. I stood in front of all those women and spoke about everything that I had been holding inside me for years.
When I started attending the sessions, I instantly felt that others cared about me. They would ask me, “How are you?” Those were not just words but a genuine concern. Suddenly, I felt like a human again. My voice was being heard. I stopped having recurring nightmares, and became calmer and better able to concentrate on myself.
” Throughout the sessions, I realised that I could not be defined by the way others treated me, especially when I was being treated so unfairly.
My husband would tell, ‘Why do you need to do that theater? You’re not an actress.’
Yet, week after week, I continued attending the programme, never missing any session. ”
Throughout the sessions, I realised that I could not be defined by the way others treated me, especially when I was being treated so unfairly. My husband would tell, “Why do you need to do that theater? You’re not an actress.” Yet, week after week, I continued attending the programme, never missing any session. My entire week would be one thing, whereas those three hours that we spent in the drama therapy session were something else.
My personality became stronger. I would no longer cry whenever something happened. I used to constantly think about my husband and whether he was cheating on me, but those thoughts are no longer a part of me. I know my worth now.
Being able to tell my story on stage in the “Beit Beyout” production is what I appreciate the most about the Intisar Foundation drama therapy programme. Before that, no one had listened to me, and people would tell me to change my narrative and thank God for not being in a worse situation. However, standing on stage and telling parts of my story helped me in ways that I could not imagine. I was heard and seen for the first time.
I now know that I have to forge my own way in life. I am determined to give myself and my child a better life. After the programme, I wanted to better myself, so I took courses in English, because I want to be able teach my son when he comes back from school. I am now taking an accounting course.
For me, self-empowerment is about becoming independent and confident. It is about not defining yourself by your circumstances, or your past, but by your own potential.
I hope all women get a chance to try drama therapy and to be seen and heard like I was.
” For me, self-empowerment is about becoming independent and confident. It is about not defining yourself by your circumstances, or your past, but by your own potential. “
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